November 2011
13 posts
6 tags
63. [ENT] North Star – SHORT REVIEW EDITION
SCORE: (4/5 stars)
I like westerns. Not enough to say I’m a fan (I couldn’t even tell you the name of any John Wayne film aside from True Grit) but I love the idea of the frontier. Indeed, Star Trek itself was pitched to the networks as “Wagon Train to the stars,” and there’s something about a man going out and staking his claim that appeals to my libertarian heart. In a...
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62. [ENT] Twilight – SHORT REVIEW EDITION
SCORE: (5/5 stars)
In this episode of Twilight, Edward and Bella – wait, sorry. In this episode named Twilight, they fail. The Xindi superweapon is built and destroys Earth. But worst of all… Archer can’t remember. (Actually, no, strike that. Earth getting destroyed is still worse.) An anomaly carrying extradimensional parasites hits Archer and infects his brain, causing him to be...
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61. [ENT] The Shipment – SHORT REVIEW EDITION
SCORE: (3/5 stars)
The Evil Council of Evil is just 100 kilograms of plot-tonium and a few weeks away from completing their weapon. The plot-tonium is fortuitously being manufactured on the very planet that Creepy Telepath Stalker alerted Enterprise to in the previous episode. A scouting mission investigates the manufacturing site and learns it’s manned by Xindi-Arboreals (basically...
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60. [ENT] Exile – SHORT REVIEW EDITION
SCORE: (2/5 stars)
In this episode, Hoshi stars on a sci-fi rendition of the Phantom of the Opera, while Enterprise is off hunting down a potential second sphere. Hoshi finds herself being telepathically called to by a shadowy figure who gives her coordinates to his planet. It’s not far from where T’Pol has predicted the sphere to be, so they swing by to make contact. The man turns...
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59. [ENT] Impulse – SHORT REVIEW EDITION
SCORE: (3/5 stars)
Cold open: T’Pol has become erratic, emotional, and hostile due to a plot device. Wait, hmm, that doesn’t really narrow down the episode much. As she’s sedated and wheeled into the imaging chamber, we go back a day to find out why! Enterprise finds a derelict Vulcan ship, which T’Pol reveals she served aboard years before. It’s caught inside an...
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58. [ENT] Rajiin – SHORT REVIEW EDITION
SCORE: (2/5 stars)
The Evil Council of Evil is growing impatient with the slow progress made on the Xindi Superweapon, and the insects and reptiles want to push through with an alternate plan. Dun dun DUUUUUUUN. On Enterprise, Trip expresses concern that the crew thinks T’Pol’s neuropressure techniques are actually a ploy to get better ratings by sexualizing the show, while Archer...
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57. [ENT] Extinction – SHORT REVIEW EDITION
SCORE: (1/5 stars)
God dammit. This episode. *sigh* Okay so in this fabulous episode of Enterprise, Archer, Hoshi and Reed get infected with a virus that turns them into humanoid frogs when they go down on a planet to search for Xindi. T’Pol’s physiology resists the virus so she’s stuck on the planet with a bunch of twitchy babbling idiots who can’t even speak English...
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56. [ENT] Anomaly – SHORT REVIEW EDITION
SCORE: (2/5 stars)
Enterprise runs into a massive pocket of anomalies, doing everything from warping the hallway and knocking crew on their asses to tossing up all the food trays in the mess hall to destabilizing the warp core. As soon as they’ve dropped out of warp, they find a derelict whose crew is dead and their ship’s been stripped of anything valuable. They figure that whoever...
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55. [ENT] The Xindi – SHORT REVIEW EDITION
SCORE: (2/5 stars)
The Evil Council of Evil meets to discuss the arrival of a human vessel in Xindi space, giving our first look at the five different species of Xindi (two are CGI!). Six weeks in, Enterprise is dealing with daily anomalies, the latest being a cargo room where the cargo keeps shifting from one wall to the other. They’ve had little to no success finding anything out about...
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54. [ENT] Season 2 Review
SCORE: (3.04/5 stars)
Trying to find its legs and establish its own presence in the Star Trek universe is never an easy task for any new series. The first two seasons of every show since TNG have traditionally been a rocky start where the writers are still working out the characters and figuring out the message they want the series to have, but at the very least they’ve drawn on what they...
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53. [ENT] The Expanse – SHORT REVIEW EDITION
SCORE: (3/5 stars)
The season 2 finale is upon us, and it isn’t really a proper episode so much as it’s a teaser trailer for season 3 and the Xindi story arc, also known as the biggest waste of time in Trek history, but we’ll get to that. A probe arrives in orbit of Earth and fires a laser at the planet, cutting a chasm from Florida to Venezuela and killing seven million...
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52. [ENT] Bounty – SHORT REVIEW EDITION
SCORE: (1/5 stars)
While visiting a planet for science and R&R, Enterprise is hailed by a Tellarite shuttle. The guy offers to be the tour guide for the planet, but instead kidnaps Archer. Thumbs down. Would not buy again. Turns out Archer’s escape from the inescapable prison planet of Rura Penthe made the Klingons a wee bit tetchy, and he has a bounty of 9000 [UNIT OF CURRENCY] on his...
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51. [ENT] First Flight – SHORT REVIEW EDITION
SCORE: (3/5 stars)
Enterprise arrives at a dark matter nebula (which of course they can only infer, because they can’t see it). They hatch a plan to illuminate the nebula by firing treknobabble at it. Archer receives a call from Admiral Forrest: an old colleague from the NX test program has just died scaling Mount McKinley. Archer decides to use the nebula illumination mission as a time...
